Fire!!

It's 11:00 pm, and I have just gotten into bed. It is warm in my room and I am lying in bed listening to the hoodlums outside. Just as I begin to fall asleep I am jolted awake by the most annoying sound in the world. The fire alarm in my apartment building is screaming at me to get out of the building. Imagine the smoke alarm in your home, now multiply that by ten.

I jump out of bed and instantly run to Madelyn's bedroom. She is sound asleep, oblivious to the ridiculously loud siren blaring in the hallway. Lindsey is running from room to room, not sure why, although I am sure she is freaking out. I grab a towel and cover the alarm to muffle the sound as Lindsey grabs Madelyn. We grab some clothes and head down stairs from our third floor apartment. As we reach the second floor, I start to smell smoke. Down another flight of stairs and the smell is even stronger on the first floor. I look down the hallway and I can see that there is a small amount of smoke in the hallway. Lindsey and Madelyn are out of the building by now, but I stay behind to check it out.

This is the part where I would like to tell you about the little old lady I rescued or the children I carried from a burning apartment. But that is not what happened. I didn't even get to rescue a puppy, not even a goldfish.

Feeling slightly cheated, I start to realize that the smoke I smell is sweet, like bbq. I remember smelling the smoke just before I went to bed and thinking that smells good! At that point I figure that somebody must watch way too much Food Network. Their cooking skills just scared the crap out of all their neighbors!

I join Lindsey and Madelyn outside in the parking lot. Everybody from my building is standing around looking annoyed. I notice one gal roaming the parking lot who looks much more anxious than the rest of us. Let’s just say she looks nothing like Rachel Ray. I wanted to ask her what's for dinner, but I decided I would move my car out of the complex just in case the whole place goes up in flames. At least I will be able to drive somewhere for the night.

Within 15 minutes, what seems like the entire Eugene Fire Department shows up, lights and sirens blaring. This finally wakes up Madelyn and she can’t believe her eyes, there are fire trucks everywhere! She looks like a kid at Christmas! She sure loves fire trucks. Which is interesting, I thought, because as Madelyn is checking out all the pretty fire trucks, her mom is checking out all the pretty firemen. Hilarious! You can't make this stuff up.

It takes about 10 minutes for the pretty Firemen to clear the building and let us back in. As we get back to our apartment, Madelyn wants to know how the fire trucks got here, and her mom wants to know why all firemen are so hot, even the chubby old ones!Not having a pg answer for either question, I turn on the Food Network and consider fixing a snack.